Morning Head: Sweeeeeeeeeeeeep!

This is Karina Smirnoff, who is on "Dancing with the Stars." I have never watched that show, not even when Stacy Keibler was on the show looking like this. And, well, that basically means there are no circumstances under which I would. I take that back, I would watch if Brooklyn Decker wore this (hint: you've seen this before. Click carefully).

The Red Wings have a much different feel this year, don't they? Not only did they finish off the sweep of the Coyotes Wednesday night, being the first team to advance to the second round, but they did it while there were so many reasons they shouldn't have. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying the Wings were the underdog going into Game 4, but there were a lot things going on that you would think would lead to a Phoenix win: 1. Henrik Zetterberg missing his sixth straight game; 2. Johan Franzen being a late scratch; 3. The Wings were up 3-0 and were going to have to fly home anyway; 4. Supposedly, winning a close-out game is the hardest thing to do; 5. This might have been the last fucking game in Phoenix. Of course, all of that wound up being trumped by the thing that matters most in sports: The Red Wings were a vastly superior team. I love this team, I really do. And I don't want to get too carried away in a sweep of what was probably the worst playoff team in the Western Conference, but if the Wings play at the top of their game, I don't think anyone can beat them. (Freep)

Here's some Phoenix perspective. Gotta say I feel for the hardcore Coyotes fans, who are more than likely about to lose their team. But people of Winnipeg, consider this the 15-year-later apology from the Red Wings. (Five For Howling)

Elsewhere in a busy night in the NHL: Ryan Miller shut out the Flyers to tie the series at 2; Anaheim dominated the third period for a 6-3 win to tie their series with the Predators at 2; and the Penguins and Capitals each came away with double overtime victories to grab 3-1 series leads. (Puck Daddy)

The Tigers won 3-2 Wednesday afternoon, avoiding a series loss against the Mariners, which would have been embarrassing. Also embarrassing? Ryan Raburn being a second baseman, or just having a glove on his hand at all. (MLive)

At least we're not Mets fans. Although, we would have had the opportunity to wake up and see this, which is the new best sports lede ever written. (Sports Pickle)

This is more baseball news than I should probably be linking to in April, but the Dodgers were taken over by the MLB, which is apparently good news? (L.A. Times)

The Lakers tied their series with the Hornets last night, but boy I would not be all that confident if I were a Lakers fan. The Hornets are not very good outside of Chris Paul, and that's being remarkably kind. Sure, Paul is spectacular, but there are other point guards in the league that can give the Lakers that same kind of trouble. And apparently all you need to neutralize Pau Gasol is a big body. Although, which team has those ingredients? The Spurs? The Thunder? I'm going to stop analyzing basketball now. (L.A. Times)

The crazy asshole who poisoned those trees at Toomer's Corner? Yeah, he was beaten up in Auburn territory Wednesday and hospitalized. These fucking people are crazy. (CBS Sports)

These people are trying to die: